Originally from December 12, 2013:
A: Hey Miles, what color birthday hat do you want? They have red, yellow, green, tan, pink, orange, blue, and white.
M:Â (excitedly) Ooooh, tan.
You’ve got to love a kid who gets worked up over earth tones.
December 26, 2017
Tobin: Miles, if you have skin, and you speak English or Spanish or something like that, you’re human.
December 22, 2017
Aw, Callum.
A: You’re such a good boy.
C: (reaching over and hugging me) YOU’RE such a good boy.
December 17, 2017
Callum is in a very “I do it all by myself†stage, including reciting our bedtime ritual.
A: I love you, my little sweetheart. Night ni—
T: *I* say it. Night night, sleep tight, don’t let bedbugs bite. That’s right!
A: I love you.
T: I love MYSELF.
March 28, 2018:
Callum was being sloppy with his frozen yogurt.
A: Please don’t do that. I do laundry almost every day and I don’t like it.
M: Join a nudist colony.
March 16, 2018:
T: The wish I made on a star came true!
A: Oh really? What was your wish?
T: That Mommy would love me forever.
A: Oh, that would have come true no matter what.
T: I should have wished for the foot shower to work.
February 16, 2018
A: You’re awfully handsome, Tobin.
T: I know.
(Pause)
T: Who wouldn’t be handsome in a broccoli shirt?
February 15, 2018
Over breakfast:
D: Does something smell bad?
A: Is it the garbage? Is it residual from last night’s dinner?
D: I don’t think so.
T: Is it your BREATH?
January 12, 2018:
In a conversation about Martin Luther King, Jr. and the still-existing racism in our country, including Trump’s recent racist B.S.:
T: He’s an A-word-hole. And an F-word-hole. Wait, there’s no F-word-hole. Actually, the A-word makes the F-word.
From this I gathered that he thinks the F-word is “fart.” I hope we both learned something today.
January 11, 2018:
Callum got some unspecified minor bonk. “I hurt my… [gesturing vaguely at his side] hippo.”
January 11, 2018:
“Are we just having…rubbish for dinner?” –Tobin, (hopefully) mischaracterizing the mishmash of leftovers and sandwiches we have on nights I can’t manage to cook something specific.
January 1, 2018:
Tobin and I were doing an activity about the five senses, and it prompted me to ask him what his favorite thing to smell is.
His answer: “Mommy’s armpit.â€
I’m so honored.
August 28, 2018:
Callum was playing a game and got thwarted by a pop-up.
C: Will you help me close this…ad…itude?
Later:
C: It’s ad-ituding again!
August 27, 2018:
Callum was digging around in his nose.
A: Is it kind of boogery in there?
C: Yes. Can you get it out?
[I make a mostly-feigned attempt.]
A: Sorry, I can’t. Would you like to use a Kleenex and blow your nose?
C: Try your pinkie.
July 19, 2018:
C:Â This Pez dispenser has no Pez. Can we fill it with yes Pez?
July 16, 2018:
T: The oldest woman in the world died recently.
M: Who was the oldest man?
T: I don’t have Wikipedia in my head, Miles.
July 10, 2018:
“You piece of… PORK!” –Tobin, insulting Miles as gravely as could muster.
June 26, 2018:
Callum, after accidentally launching a video ad on a game he was playing:
C:Â What the heck did I DID?
June 21, 2018:
T: This rain is good for the garden! And the bushes! And the hostages!
.
.
.
(Hostas)
June 19, 2018:
A: Dang it, where did I put my coffee?
C, very tenderly: I can give you hug.
June 6, 2018:
T: Were cars invented in your day, Mom?
November 5, 2018:
I was attempting to cuddle and nuzzle Callum.
C: Don’t rub me ’cause I have lots of makeup on.
October 29, 2018:
Before we went grocery shopping, Callum and I both needed to use the bathroom.
A: Do you want to go first, or should I?
C: You go first.
A: Okay.
[I headed in the direction of the bathroom, only to find Callum very mad at me.]
C: I was talking to MYSELF.
October 22, 2018:
Callum and I were discussing who might sleep in our guest room.
C: Mubby and Skitter.
A: Yes, and…?
C: Nana and Papa.
A: Yes, and…?
C: Aunt Shannon.
A: Yes, and…?
C: And whobody else?
October 17, 2018:
Callum was getting started on a painting project, and I mentioned that his brothers would be home soon.
C: So Miles can see my beautiful arting!
October 12, 2018:
I was hemming pants for Denny to wear to a wedding we’re attending tomorrow.
C: Are you working on Daddy’s costume?
September 29, 2018:
[Note to future readers:Â we went to the local Oktoberfest event and volunteered with trash management and also stayed to enjoy the festivities]
“I played in a bouncy house and a slide and I got a balloon and a drink and music and garbage!”
September 27, 2018:
T: Can I take a walk around the potato sack?
A: The what?
T: The potato sack.
A: Do you mean the cul-de-sac?
T: No, the potato sack.
A: What’s the potato sack?
T: The same as what you said.
September 24, 2018:
T: I just love making the “puh” noise. It’s so satisfying. Puh, puh, puh.
A: When you were a baby, you loved the “kuh” sound. [Referring to video linked here]
T: Actually, I still find that amusing.
September 19, 2018:
A: What’s that?
C: It’s for Play-Doh.
A: Oh, a Play-Doh thingy.
C: No, an extruder.
September 17, 2018:
Callum and I were watching a cooking video together.
A: What’s your favorite food?
C: Pepperoni pizza!
A: What’s Tobin’s favorite food?
C: Wheat Thins!
A: What’s Miles’s favorite food?
C: Strawberries!
A: What’s Daddy’s favorite food?
C: Chocolate cake!
A: What’s my favorite food?
C: (pausing to consider) Juicy.
A: Juicy?
C: … SUSHI!
September 17, 2018:
Callum made it to the bathroom without waiting too long and dribbling in his underpants, which has been an issue lately.
C: Are you so proud of me?
A: I am!
C: Will you do a dance for me?
A: Uh…sure.
Then I did a dance of honor and celebration as limited by the confines of our small bathroom.
September 11, 2018:
Miles was trying to explain the planets to Callum.
M: They’re big balls that float around in space.
C: I can pick it up?
M: No, they’re much too big and heavy for you to pick up.
C: It goes all the way to the ceiling!
—
Powered by WordPress